Study Finds Most People Struggle With 1 of 4 Core Regrets. How To Avoid

Bestselling author Daniel Pink has a new book “The Power of Regret". He analyzed decades of research and surveyed more than 26-thousand people from 130 countries about their biggest regrets.

“Everybody has regrets. It’s one of the most common emotions that human beings have,” Pink explains in a recent episode of “The Oprah Podcast.” “And yet, we’ve been sold a bill of goods about positivity and being positive all the time that when we feel regret, we think we’re the only one.”

So, instead of trying to avoid regrets or running from them, Pink says we should try to use these mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow. Through his research, he’s found most people struggle with four core regrets:

• Foundation regrets - Pink describes these as “small decisions people make early in life that accumulate to terrible consequences later on.” These include things like not contributing regularly to your 401(k), so you don’t have as much in retirement savings as you’d like.
• Boldness regrets - These are “born from opportunities when you didn’t take a risk, and later on, you wish you did.” It could be something like you wanted to start a business, but were afraid it wouldn’t work, so now you’re stuck in a corporate job that doesn’t fulfill you.
• Moral regrets - The author says these “are the result of consciously making a bad decision instead of a good one.” One example could be that you were mean to someone when you were in school and you still feel guilty about it years later.
• Connection regrets - These are when you “lose a close connection with someone, either platonically or romantically.” Losing touch with your best friend because your careers make it tough to spend time together is one kind of connection regret.

According to Pink, the key is to not get stuck in regret because that can potentially have a negative effect on mental health. So, how do we turn these mistakes into something positive? “It’s very simple,” he says. “Treat yourself with kindness rather than contempt.”